A Man and his Penguin

I’m writing this from work; don’t tell anyone!

We just had the strangest transaction ever.

A man walked in, tattoos over his upper body. The tattoos were visible because he wasn’t wearing a shirt.

Linda served him with his purchases, which were a blender and hair clippers. He tells her that the price on the blender was $69, when in actual fact it was $79. She did accidentally overcharge him $5 on the clippers, but he was still $5 ahead.

Later on, he came back in, still sans-shirt, just about to go to a funeral and needs a stereo system! In under 60 seconds he chooses what he wants, which is $195. He can’t work out how to open the CD tray. Who cares? He hands Linda $200, tells her to keep the change, and walks out with the stereo!

We almost pissed ourselves, it was so funny.

——

Here’s something else funny I saw on Cnet. It’s probably the funniest review of a terrible product ever. Click the "review" tab on that page to see the full, hilarious review.

10 Creepiest Craigslist Casual Encounters. Also funny reading.

I have been chatting to a new Linux user online; I’m sorta mentoring him and answering his questions. Here’s a recent exchange:

Hey 3rdalbum,

Thanking you again,
Techdudezz

It’s actually the other way around - the Internet has always been run on and designed around Unix and Unix-like systems (Linux, mostly). You’ve probably noticed that the "path delimiter" on Linux is a forward slash (/), on Windows it’s a backslash (\), and on the classic Mac OS it was a colon (:). The path delimiter on the Internet is a forward slash, which tells you that the Internet was designed around Unix systems. Also, I don’t know if you’ve done web development before, but in a hyperlink you use "../" to specify the directory above the current one - you also use it for the same purpose on a Linux system.

The suffixes aren’t even necessary on the Internet - the HTTP header that is sent by the server and recieved by the web browser specifies a "MIME type", which says what sort of document is being transferred. Suffixes were used in the early days to differentiate HTML documents and plain text documents (HTML is plain text with markup tags), because at that time HTML and plain text were identified with the same MIME type. These days, the suffixes are used out of inertia and for Windows compatibility, and let’s face it, they’re good for security as you can tell from the address bar exactly what you are downloading

Before you go and delete the file extensions on all your files, though, you should be aware that Abiword, OOo, MS Office 2007, and Scribus save their documents into XML files that are placed inside tarballs. Without the file extension to identify the program, Linux just assumes that these are ordinary archives. Make a copy of an OOo document and get rid of the filename extension, reload the folder list and see what I mean

A handy command is "file". Type "file " and then the name of a file into the terminal, and you’ll be told what sort of file it is; for some files you even get very specific information. This magic is performed, funnily enough, by a package called "libmagic". It looks at the file’s contents and determines what sort of file it is. This is in contrast to the Mac OS, which instead relies on the creator of the document to store a 4-character "creator code" identifying the program that created it and another 4-character "file type" identifying the type of file.

Now, an unusual twist to the conversation.

Hey 3rdalbum,

The whole linux community is
working in the wrong direction. Unless its not changed, no way am I
going to adopt it (really man, I’m really pissed off). And, you know
why people aren’t actually going on a riot and killing every Linux
developer they see ? Because its given for free. What are your thoughts
?

Of course, I have some thoughts about this:

Lots of people do say that the Macintosh is Unix, but in reality it’s a messy mismash of a 1980s BSD fork, modern FreeBSD, some NetBSD, Carbon, and a big chunky proprietary Apple layer that is developed by people who don’t know the first thing about working *within* an existing security system.

If Mac OS X is Unix, then it’s the only Unix with such a f*cked up security system you need to "reset the permissions" every so often.

If you feel like you’re inside a black box on Linux, then there’s something wrong. For instance, look inside the file /etc/gdm/gdm.conf - this file, which is excellently commented, defines virtually everything about the login screen. You can modify it by hand if you want, to completely customise it. (although in this case, it’s recommended that you instead edit /etc/gdm/gdm.conf-custom - which is the same sort of thing).

Take a look inside /etc some time - it’s a treasure trove of interesting things you can do with your system. I understand if you would prefer GUIs for everything, but if you try to pack all the text-file configuration options into a GUI, you quickly get something intimidating. I seem to have developed a phobia of Windows XP’s configuration GUIs after clicking too many buttons marked "Properties…" and "Advanced…".

For everyday purposes, people don’t want to delve down into the parts of the system and do advanced tweaking. I use Linux for very ordinary, everyday purposes - shrinking DVDs, loading my MP3 player, web surfing, VoIP, office documents. I even do some video editing. I didn’t need to drop to the CLI or hand-modify root-owned files to perform these tasks.

I think the successes of the Asus EeePC and the Everex gPC are evidence
that "regular" people can use a pre-installed, pre-configured Linux.

As for Windows and Mac OS being easy to use, it’s really all to do with your familiarity. If you’ve been brought up with Windows, you’ll be able to use Windows without too much difficulty. If you’ve been brought up with Windows, you will probably find it easy-ish to switch to the Macintosh - after all, Windows has always been based on the concepts from the Mac OS. However, Linux is based around a completely different system. There are fundamental reasons why things are done in particular ways in Linux.

I’ve been using Linux for close on 2 years (time flies!). Before that, I was a Mac user. Somehow, I switched from Mac to Linux quite easily. Last year I bought my first Windows PC for use with Linux. Every time I have to do any sort of configuration with this machine, I struggle against it. People consider me to be a "computer whiz" and they ask me to come over to their house and fix some problem with their Windows computer… but I often fail, and even when I succeed it usually involves a trip to the Microsoft Knowledge Base. A trip to the MKB ends off being a trip to the DOS prompt or the Registry Editor, and don’t think that those DOS commands are something you can understand! They usually require 3 or more mandatory parameters before they will do anything.

No, Windows is easy to use if you don’t have to administer it. Linux is easy to use if you don’t have to administer it. Mac OS is easy to use if you believe it to be secure, which it isn’t; but administration can also be tricky. In particular, recovery from unbootable situations is immensely difficult on the Mac OS, and always involves either a reinstall or another bad crash 2 months down the track.

Oh, don’t get me wrong. Some things on Linux need improving. Compiling software needs to be easier - there’s no reason why it couldn’t be (note that compiling software on Linux is easier than on Windows). The kernel needs a stable ABI for drivers. Otherwise, the Linux desktop is here and ready for everyday use, as long as people are willing to accept that it is different to the other operating systems that are out there.

Stick with Linux. You’re still new to the operating system, and I’m sure things will become less of a black box once you start looking through the files in /etc.

I sometimes want to kill Windows developers - that operating system frustrates me with its intrusiveness and confounds me at every turn. But that’s neither here nor there

I had the morning off work (as I worked 8:30 to 8pm Thursday), so I went to the local Australian Electoral Commission office and voted.

Nobody I talked to today believed that it was possible to vote early. Well, I only found out through the AEC website.

I wish all candidates good luck tomorrow.

(I think Labor will win by a large margin. I will be represented in the figures for swing).

As I was driving home tonight I got really excited about the election process, and for some reason quite proud of my vote. Voting is mandatory here. Last election, I had a lot of cognitive dissonance regarding my vote; this time I am pleased with the way things went.

Recently, Barack Obama said that he’d like to make available all the US government’s data online in "universally accessible formats". A lot of people immediately assumed that the format he was talking about was OpenDocument, and got very excited. A second wave of people has pointed out that "universally accessible formats" could be a number of different things.

Does it really matter? Okay, it would be nice to have such an endorsement of OpenDocument, but the "accessible formats" part wasn’t the crux of Obama’s speech. The crux was that government data was to be opened up to the public, without having to go through the channels and request things under the Freedom Of Information Act!

I don’t know about YOU, comrade, but I think free information and a freer society is more important than just the use of a free file format.

I love Skype sometimes. I set my status to "Skype Me" and see who messages me.

Right now I’m talking to a beautiful Venezuelan woman. Tomorrow I might be talking to a shy Chinese girl.

And the sound quality is great!

Previous communications with the iTunes Music Store Support have not yielded any results in removing the artificial restrictions on the music video that I *bought*. I am completely disgusted with the way your service treats me like a pirate, when I am *NOT*. I simply wanted to convert the video I *bought* into a format that would play on my MP3 player. Therefore, unless this video can be provided to me in a usable format, I want my iTunes Music Store account closed immediately, and the remaining $1.60 on my account to be refunded to me. If you have any questions, I am contactable on the above e-mail address.

Well, they *are* treating me as though I was a pirate. (which, admittedly, I am, but not very often and not for profit). It’s probably a long shot to expect a cheque for $1.60, but I’m pissed off and it’s just nine cents short of getting another song! The iTunes pricing is rigged so that you always end off with $1 < $1.69, it seems.

As for LG Excellerate, I have used my soon-to-expire points to buy the Borat DVD instead of another DRM-infested product.

My monitor is dying, so I’ll have to go and buy a new LCD which will look fuzzy outside its native resolution. Damn.

AUSTRALIANS: The Asus EEEpc is going to be launched at Myer on December 2nd. Unfortunately, the thing is going to be released at a price of $499. For comparison, I paid $560 for the desktop computer sitting next to me. For comparison, one of the big electrical chains here was selling a Compaq notebook for $550, I believe, after cashback.

It’s great that Aussies will be able to get this computer, but it’s not great that it’s overpriced. Teaming up with Myer was a bad idea - somebody should have told Asus that Myer makes money through marking up, not through rapid sell-through (the two are mutually exclusive).

Sure, at $500 I’m sure Myer will sell a good number of them. They might even sell one to me; I don’t know for certain yet. But Asus will sell fewer units per head of population here than probably anywhere else.

In reply to my Youtube video of "Where did my installed program go on Ubuntu?", I recieved the following question:

May I ask a doubt. In Windows, when you install a program, everything
comes up in the folder where its installed (eg. Program Files) and
everything is pretty straight forward.

In
Linux, I don’t understand where the files are going and what are the
.exe equivalents in Linux ? And, its quite annoying that I get access
to only the home folder (I mean, even if get full access, its really
confusing whats going on)

My answer
The files go all over the filesystem. Depending on what you’ve installed, files could go into /usr/bin, /usr/lib, /lib, /sbin, /var… there are a lot of places that files can go.

But you don’t need to know where these files go. If you ever do, go into the Synaptic Package Manager as I do in this tutorial and look for yourself! The Linux way (where a program will put files in all sorts of different places) is better as it allows other programs to use the same files - less duplication, less bloat.

This message is too short for a tour of the filesystem, but it’s easier than it looks. /bin is for the basic programs that make the computer run. /boot contains the kernel of the operating system. /lib contains basic libraries that your programs need to run. /home contains home directories. /etc contains a lot of miscellaneous stuff, including configuration files for basic parts of the system. /usr/bin contains your everyday programs. /usr/share contains miscellaneous stuff that your everyday programs require, as does /usr/lib. /var contains some other stuff; the most interesting are /var/apt/ and /var/www (the latter is where web pages get served from, if you have Apache installed). /sbin contains programs that can only be run by root (the administration account - the one that you must use "sudo" or "gksudo" to get into). Finally, /tmp contains temporary files which get wiped on shutdown.

Linux doesn’t rely on file extensions like .exe to know what is executable and what isn’t. If you open up your file browser to the /usr/bin or /bin directories, you’ll see what is executable by what icon it has. If you’re using Ubuntu, it will be a purple diamond icon. Otherwise, it might have the extension ".sh" or ".run".

Ubuntu’s security mechanism prevents you, malicious programs, and prankster colleagues from modifying the filesystem without your authorisation. Go to the terminal or the Alt-F2 Run dialog and type "gksudo nautilus". From there you should have read/write access to everything. But 99.99% of the time you don’t need to directly touch anything outside your home directory.

If there’s something in particular that you’re trying to get access to your filesystem for, tell me and I’ll see if it’s something that can be done more safely another way. But you’ve really got to remember that Linux is a completely different operating system to Windows, and if you don’t understand yet, it’s not because it’s necessarily more difficult - it’s just not what you’re used to.

Last night I started working on a DVD ripping plugin for Blacklight. It’s half-finished already. Funnily enough, the thing I haven’t done yet is implement the actual ripping - but getting a list of contents works perfectly, as does the previewing. Ripping is only a single command away; I want to implement a progress bar too, but I have an idea how to do that fairly easily.

Secondly, I’ve actually realised that my suggestion came true. My suggestion, as posted much earlier on this blog, was that by importing Chinese Linux-based computers and getting them into department stores, we could increase the Linux marketshare.

Everex is a Taiwan-based manufacturer, but Taiwan is virtually part of China anyway. They’ve developed their own Linux distribution called gOS, and a computer made to run it. The machines are being sold through Walmart in the US.

So, we looked to China for help with the Linux desktop

As part of a crackdown on piracy, The Artist Formerly Known As Prince has started sending "cease-and-desist" letters to Youtube, eBay (wtf?) and The Pirate Bay.

Why is this so? It’s probably because Prince has seen the dismal sales of his/her/its records and assumed that file sharers are to blame.

Dude, maybe people aren’t buying your albums because you’re a FREAK and your music SUCKS ARSE. And now even your fans think so. You’re a sad act, and I hope your lawyers demanded their pay upfront because by the time this is over you won’t have any money left.

I mean, seriously, what person in their right mind would want to buy a copy of "Purple Rain"? I’m surprised people even want to pirate it.

"It’s about a bloke in stupid tights singing songs to a dove, with some half-arsed moustache and bum-fluff clinging desperately to the bottom of his chin!" - Mick Molloy

I hope this message to you has made you so upset that you go and sexually abuse some more 5-year-old boys, to cheer yourself up.